(Health Update: so, turns out it’s not actually the “flu” but a nasty virus that mimics all the symptoms. It’s supposed to run three-four days so I’m hopful I’ll be free of the most of the disomfort by tomorrow evening. Thanks for your prayers!
In the meantime, here’s a Day 31 from 2016…)
Raise your hand if you love to wait! Umm….probably not too many, I’m guessing?
Most of the time I’m a pretty patient “waiter” – especially if I anticipate the wait and come armed with reading material and maybe some snacks. =) But it’s totally a personality thing….I know some people who hate, and I mean HATE to wait. They get antsy waiting in lines and an unexpected trip to the DMV is their worst nightmare. But I think even for those who struggle with waiting, it’s made easier when you have an idea it might be coming and can mentally prepare. And it’s also something I’ve been doing quite a lot of lately…
There is nothing…and I mean nothing that can prepare you for certain life changes – those events that interrupt the future you pictured for yourself and your family, and there are many types of such “interruptions.” Whether it’s the sudden loss of a job, the end of a relationship you thought was forever or the death of a loved one it just takes time….lots and lots of time….to find your way out of that place into a new place. And what we do in the meantime can look and feel a lot like….waiting.
“Waiting Here For You” is a song that’s so special to me because it’s helped me to not only acknowledge the waiting, but to embrace it. It started coming across my Pandora worship station around a year ago but it wasn’t until I started seriously walking daily that it got personal. I remember it was a Saturday and I was about mid-way through a 5 mile trek, wanting to pray, wanting to worship, wanting to feel like things could ever be “good” again but all I felt was this sense of all of those things being “out there” somewhere, in a place I wasn’t yet. And this song gave very powerful words to express where I was….where I still am in some respects….waiting.
Waiting here for you
With our hands lifted high in praise
And it’s you we adore
Singing Alleluia
Tears streaming down my face, without even thinking about what I was doing, I raised both hands without breaking my stride and surrendered to the waiting…..
You are everything you’ve promised
Your faithfulness is true
And we’re desperate for your presence
All we need is you
Surrender isn’t easy….and it’s usually among the last things I remember to do….but it’s also liberating. This song helps me throw all of my pain, all of my confusion, all of my brokenness and all of my altered dreams back at the feet of Jesus. It’s all too heavy to carry on my own, and He doesn’t want me to! But healing – the kind of healing that comes from very deep wounds is a process. And the truth about waiting through these times is this; healing happens in the waiting. God is doing marvelous, wonderful things while we simply trust Him – even when it doesn’t look or feel like change is happening….there is transformation in the waiting times.
So, I have a thing now with this song….when it shows up on my song feed, no matter where I’m walking….when I hear “with our hands lifted high in praise…” I have to do so. (Even though sometimes people think I’m waving at them!) It’s like a reminder to God that I still trust Him, even though so much of my heart still feels like I’m waiting….and I surrender my anxious heart all over again.
I’m trying my best to move through this season of grief and heartache as faithfully as I can….and I can’t tell you the peace it brings to remember that the entire process of healing my heart and my life is up to God – and that whatever He has for me….it’s worth the wait. <3
Waiting Here For You
Christy Nockels
Let the mountains move
We come with expectation
Waiting here for you, waiting here for you
You’re the Lord of all creation
And still you know my heart
The author of salvation
You’ve loved us from the start
Waiting here for you
With our hands lifted high in praise
And it’s you we adore
Singing Alleluia
You are everything you’ve promised
Your faithfulness is true
And we’re desperate for your presence
All we need is you
Waiting here for you, Lord
With our hands lifted high in praise
And it’s you, Lord, we adore
Singing Alleluia
We will wait for you, Lord, he’ll stand with you
We will sing alleluia
Singing Alleluia, alleluia
Singing Alleluia, alleluia
Waiting here for you
With our hands lifted high in praise
And it’s you we adore, we adore
Singing Alleluia
Waiting here for you
With our hands lifted high in praise
And it’s you we adore
Singing Alleluia, singing Alleluia
Waiting here for you
With our hands lifted high in praise
And it’s you we adore, with our lives
Singing Alleluia, singing Alleluia
