Day 40….can you believe it? I have to admit….I’ve been dragging my feet all day, not really wanting to write this last post because, well….it’s the last. (But not really, because if all goes well, you should wake up to a brief celebration Easter post….it just never seems right to end before Easter!)
But for the purposes of 40 songs for 40 days….here we are. Thousands of words, lots of image searching (I’m quite particular about those), over four hours of music (all legally purchased and shared…gotta take care of our musicians!), many hours of angsty struggle for what God would have me share and buckets of tears later, the overriding emotion (’cause you know I have lots of ’em!) is…..gratitude.
I’m grateful for the chance to share the ways God has been healing my heart – grateful for writers and musicians who have spoken for and to me when I had so little hope – grateful to those in my life who love me in spite of my brokenness….but mostly, grateful that God loves me enough to keep pursuing me. And oh, how he has! If I was running from him, he was running faster to me, and just like our “Runaway Bunny”, I now know that nothing – absolutely nothing will dissuade him from that pursuit!
Jesus paid such a dear, dear price to redeem us – why would we ever question his love for us? This night before the resurrection is a mystery. Where was Jesus and what was he doing? We get some clues from scripture that allude to a battle, and I’ve always imagined him doing just that – fighting for us even in death, until the war was finally won, and death was defeated once and for all. That is where our hope comes from! This life is a gift in all of its beauty and loveliness, but it’s not all there is. We are promised that there is another life to come, but without the heartache, pain and loss that comes with this one….that we will see loved ones again and will finally, finally see our savior face to face. I’m so ready for that day!
Initially, when I felt writing these reflections might be a “God thing”, I was pretty sure he was looking up the wrong girl….I was so broken, so unfocused and so unsure of everything….who was I to try to find encouragement for others?
Sigh……….and here we come to one of the things I love the most about the way God chooses to love and heal us. He had no interest in waiting until I “felt healed” to want to use me. He knows me….and he knows that in order to stay honest and authentic in writing these daily reflections, I would have to spend time with him….I would have to ask, implore, shout the questions of my heart to him in order to break through the foggy mist of sorrow to find hope. And you know what?
It worked!
I also felt strongly that I couldn’t be the only one who was a Jesus follower who had suffered loss to the point of questioning his faithfulness. I wanted those who may be where I was to know it was OK….that God could handle our questions, and indeed wanted us to ask them. Our relationship with God is just that….a relationship. He wants to hear from us, and it’s pretty pointless to pretend we think or feel things that we don’t, wouldn’t you say? Because…well….he’s God, and he kinda knows the truth anyway. =) So my greatest hope in these 40 days has been for you, my heart-weary friends….that you would find encouragement and strength to keep believing – to keep waiting for the path to grow more clear and most of all to know you aren’t alone!
So, at the end of this Lenten journey together, I will close with a final word of thanks to you….who have been my companions on this wild, sometimes painful but always rewarding trek. Thank you for every like, every share, every comment, every prayer, and your willingness to go to the hard places together. We have found God to be faithful!
With much love and gratitude,
Shellie <3
Forever
Kari Jobe
The morning sun was dead
The Saviour of the world was fallen
His body on the cross
His blood poured out for us
The weight of every curse upon him
One final breath he gave
As heaven looked away
The son of God was laid in darkness
A battle in the grave
The war on death was waged
The power of hell forever broken
The ground began to shake
The stone was rolled away
His perfect love could not be overcome
Now death where is your sting?
Our resurrected King
Has rendered you defeated
Forever he is glorified
Forever he is lifted high
Forever he is risen
He is alive, He is alive!
The ground began to shake
The stone was rolled away
His perfect love could not be overcome
Now death where is your sting?
Our resurrected King
Has rendered you defeated
Forever he is glorified
Forever he is lifted high
Forever he is risen
He is alive, He is alive!
We sing hallelujah
We sing hallelujah
We sing hallelujah
The Lamb has overcome
We sing hallelujah
We sing hallelujah
We sing hallelujah
The Lamb has overcome
Forever he is glorified
Forever he is lifted high
Forever he is risen
He is alive, He is alive!
You have overcome
You have overcome
You have overcome
You have overcome
